Reset Password
Reset Link Sent
| Blogs > secret_lade > Ramblings of the depraved..... |
It's 1:30 am.....
|
It's 1:30 am..... Of course I'm wide awake. I'm sitting on my couch with the Tilly Cat purring in my ear, Joaquin Phoenix is traipsing through the woods outside 'The Village' on the TV. I had kind of a shitty day at work today. It seems like all of my days are kind of shitty anymore, though.... I am experiencing an unending funk that I just can't seem to shake. You know that feeling you get when you are keenly aware that everything is changed, that nothing will ever be the same again? I feel that with my life right now and I'm having such a very hard time with it. Not even the beach is bringing me peace anymore. I am mourning the absence of my Boot Camp Boy so VERY much. I am pissed off at my father for dying and leaving me with a fucking mess take care of after 38 years of being absent from my life. I am hurt by the Hippie, someone I had once thought of as a best friend and partner in crime, who used my deep seated insecurity against me in my moment of weakness as I reached out him. And I feel alone in this world. I tell people a million times a day.... It will be ok. But, I'm going be completely honest here.... I don't think it will be ok. |
|||
|
nice blog
| ||
|
Hugs and kisses queen
| ||
|
secret, you've had a lot of shit go down lately and you've weathered it like a champ. it is bullshit to keep hearing "it'll be better" or "you'll be fine, give it time" in moments when a woman needs comfort and support. on the real, it is absolutely OK to feel like it ain't gonna be OK. once things change, it's never the same, ain't gonna be. tbh, every time i think pb&j, i think of you  my heart is with you ... . i know the struggle and the struggle is real.from here on out, it is a one day at a time thing. between your work life and home life, you do SO MUCH for other people, we spread ourselves thin without realizing it sometimes. START DOING things just for YOU even if it's a pedicure and you keep that massage chair on 5 minutes longer, or stop at wendy's for that frosty; i tell them to twist that shit because, yes, i want BOTH  bottom line: your feelings are valid. and you don't have to wear the 'cape' every day. the moon still shines even on the darkest night.  I haven't had one in FOREVER!
| ||
|
i have faith in you 
| ||
|
secret, you've had a lot of shit go down lately and you've weathered it like a champ. it is bullshit to keep hearing "it'll be better" or "you'll be fine, give it time" in moments when a woman needs comfort and support. on the real, it is absolutely OK to feel like it ain't gonna be OK. once things change, it's never the same, ain't gonna be. tbh, every time i think pb&j, i think of you my heart is with you ... . i know the struggle and the struggle is real.from here on out, it is a one day at a time thing. between your work life and home life, you do SO MUCH for other people, we spread ourselves thin without realizing it sometimes. START DOING things just for YOU even if it's a pedicure and you keep that massage chair on 5 minutes longer, or stop at wendy's for that frosty; i tell them to twist that shit because, yes, i want BOTH bottom line: your feelings are valid. and you don't have to wear the 'cape' every day. the moon still shines even on the darkest night.
| ||
|
i have faith in you
| ||
|
" I ,as your mom, will never say you cant come home. However, you have to look inside yourself and answer to yourself IF coming home is really what you want to do long term. Answer for yourself, isnt this what you always wanted and planned for, what is the alternative, try and answer your what if's. Each day that passes, you are closer to your goal. I will support you in any way and however you need. coming home may be a temporary solution"
| ||
|
I get it, been there and done that. Seems like life can just pile it on. I am still going through my parents stuff after like 4 years. I do what I can and when things get tough or other things come along with the car or house, I put it aside until things slow down some. As strange as this sounds when my mom died, a year later I had her closest friends for a lunch. Her picture sat at the head of the table with a glass of her favorite Wine. It was healing to hear stories about her. It made me realize that in the end, we all fail, laugh, do crazy things and try to get by the best we can. She is my mother, but in a weird way I see her as human. I hope for the best for you. I hope you can heal and get back to health.
| ||
|
I get it, been there and done that. Seems like life can just pile it on. I am still going through my parents stuff after like 4 years. I do what I can and when things get tough or other things come along with the car or house, I put it aside until things slow down some. As strange as this sounds when my mom died, a year later I had her closest friends for a lunch. Her picture sat at the head of the table with a glass of her favorite Wine. It was healing to hear stories about her. It made me realize that in the end, we all fail, laugh, do crazy things and try to get by the best we can. She is my mother, but in a weird way I see her as human. I hope for the best for you. I hope you can heal and get back to health.
| ||
|
The hardest part of all this.... Is that he wants to come home. He is homesick and writes how much he wants to come home. Every fiber of my being wants to tell him to just come home, but I can't. As much as I want him to come home, I want him to succeed.
| ||
|
Hi there you still on ? It will be ok ! I know exactly how you feel ! Last year I lost both my Mom in march and 2 months later my wife of 29 years ! The feeling of it all being over because your kids have moved on with their lives just makes things worse I know but we have to have faith that some thing good will happen for us soon ! That is what keeps me going I have recently welcomed a grandchild to our family and there is another on the way to welcome into this strange world, so with my losses of loved ones perhaps these grandkids will bring happiness to balance the world ...I know these words don't mean much,,, but Life will get better !! Hope all goes well and your world gets friendlier to you ! Take care xoxo
| ||
|
Everything will be OK
| ||
|
As someone who's been in a similar position, I can honestly say, it wont be the same, but it will eventually be OK again.
| ||
|
Good morning to you! I hope today goes better for you. Don't dwell in the past. Take each day as the come, and try to make the best of them. I am sure this is advice you have heard plenty of times. You need a friend to talk to!!!! You can talk to me, but we are too far seperated for anything else but talking. Ralph
| ||
|
I recently watched Joaquin Phoenix "swinging away" in "Signs". It will be OK, things always even up in the endless ebb and flow. 
| ||
|
Being completely honest...you have had your world rocked of late. Of course it will take time, and it wont be ok. You will learn to incorporate these changes into your daily living, but life as you knew it ....will never be the same. ......from someone who has definitely been there and is still trying to incorporate~
| ||
|
"I'm ok"... deadly words some times. When life keeps handing you shit, it's your choice on what to do with it. 1 800 662-HELP might be a good place to start
| ||
|
You've been through a lot of shit lately. Unfortunately, there's not an easy or instant cure. Things may never be the same since life is always changing, but you'll eventually find a new "OK". Just remember you have family and friends that love you.
| ||
|
It'll never be as OK as it used to be after having the virus ripping through our world. It's OK to feel alone. Just free your mind and your ass will follow
| ||
|
"You know that feeling you get when you are keenly aware that everything is changed, that nothing will ever be the same again? I feel that with my life right now and I'm having such a very hard time with it." ABSOLUTELY, I know that feeling! Just know that you have friends out here pulling for you! And Breathe, my friend! Sending you hugs!
| ||
|
Change is hard sometimes! But will get better with time! Wouldn't a good tight sincere hug be awesome right now? If I were nearby I'd give you one!
| ||
|
Change is hard sometimes! But will get better with time! Wouldn't a good tight sincere hug be awesome right now? If I were nearby I'd give you one!
| ||
|
"You know that feeling you get when you are keenly aware that everything is changed, that nothing will ever be the same again? I feel that with my life right now and I'm having such a very hard time with it." ABSOLUTELY, I know that feeling! Just know that you have friends out here pulling for you! And Breathe, my friend! Sending you hugs! ~~~" Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift." --Mary Oliver~~~
| ||
|
It'll never be as OK as it used to be after having the virus ripping through our world. It's OK to feel alone. Just free your mind and your ass will follow 
| ||
|
BIG HUGS SL... *. *. *
| ||
|
You've been through a lot of shit lately. Unfortunately, there's not an easy or instant cure. Things may never be the same since life is always changing, but you'll eventually find a new "OK". Just remember you have family and friends that love you. Pagan  Hmmmm....I know I left that wand around here somewhere!
| ||
|
"I'm ok"... deadly words some times. When life keeps handing you shit, it's your choice on what to do with it. 1 800 662-HELP might be a good place to start
| ||
|
Being completely honest...you have had your world rocked of late. Of course it will take time, and it wont be ok. You will learn to incorporate these changes into your daily living, but life as you knew it ....will never be the same. ......from someone who has definitely been there and is still trying to incorporate~
| ||
7/24/2021 4:26 am |
I recently watched Joaquin Phoenix "swinging away" in "Signs". It will be OK, things always even up in the endless ebb and flow.
| ||
|
Good morning to you! I hope today goes better for you. Don't dwell in the past. Take each day as the come, and try to make the best of them. I am sure this is advice you have heard plenty of times. You need a friend to talk to!!!! You can talk to me, but we are too far seperated for anything else but talking. Ralph
| ||
|
As someone who's been in a similar position, I can honestly say, it wont be the same, but it will eventually be OK again.
| ||
|
Everything will be OK
| ||
|
Hi there you still on ? It will be ok ! I know exactly how you feel ! Last year I lost both my Mom in march and 2 months later my wife of 29 years ! The feeling of it all being over because your kids have moved on with their lives just makes things worse I know but we have to have faith that some thing good will happen for us soon ! That is what keeps me going I have recently welcomed a grandchild to our family and there is another on the way to welcome into this strange world, so with my losses of loved ones perhaps these grandkids will bring happiness to balance the world ...I know these words don't mean much,,, but Life will get better !! Hope all goes well and your world gets friendlier to you ! Take care xoxo
|
Become a member to create a blog
